One Question That Will Change Your Life Forever

Did you know that, barring some radical scientific advancement, you and everyone you know will be gone in 100 years? All of that hard work and perseverance disappears, just like that. All of those years of striving and "just holding on", jettisoned into oblivion in an instant.

Now that I've hopefully got your attention and giving you the right mindset, here's the question: How does that make you feel?

I'm not trying to depress you, but I'm being completely serious here. Ask yourself what that means for your life. Do you feel uncomfortable? Depressed? Or even relieved? Whatever you feel, just let it flow. You'll learn a lot about yourself and where you want to go that way.

Life As a Race
When I first asked myself the exact same question, I was a little scared. After all, if I really accept that I'll be dead in 100 (or probably less) years, does that invalidate everything I'm trying to do? What about all my goals and ambitions? What about my friends and family?

When this realization of my own mortality hit me, it hit me hard. I assumed that there was no point to what I was doing, and that it all was pointless and absurd. And at the time, given the perspective that I had, I was right.

I was right back then because I was living only for achievement. I viewed life as a race, complete with all the aspects of a race: intense training, struggle, and stress, with the only payoff being the finish line. And I couldn't just cross the finish line and be happy - oh, no, I had to cross it first! What was the point otherwise? You can see how destructive that worldview is.

Fortunately I was able to change that way of thinking and introduce a better one into my life. What I realized by asking myself that question was that my life was severely lacking in perspective. I had forgotten that I am indeed a mortal creature and that all I've been striving for will eventually pass away. Goals, ambitions, dreams, all of it. I learned that the only thing I am guaranteed is right now.

By going through the uncomfortableness of confronting my own demise, I came out with a new perspective and a new way of life.

Life As a Cycle
I found that life is not a race. There is no competition, unless of course you choose to believe in competition (then you'll find plenty of it wherever you go). Instead, I found that life is more akin to a circle, or a never ending cycle.

This is something many Eastern religions have claimed for millennia, and is really quite intuitive what you think about it. Once you understand that there really is no point in reaching forward to the future for fulfillment, you begin appreciating today much more.

You start understanding that instead of there being a finish line in life, there is instead simply another journey, another cycle to be repeated. And considering the fact that we aren't taking much from this life into the next cycle, trying to amass wealth and other "stuff" becomes far less important.

Instead, a magnificent change begins unfolding in your daily life. You start noticing things you've never noticed before. Colors and sounds appear more vivid. You start noticing the flow of your own breath. The cliché "stop and smell the roses" becomes a way of life. Stress and anxiety pass away and in their death, bliss and beauty is born.

Making the Paradigm Shift
If exchanging negative emotions for positive emotions sounds like a good idea to you, then read on. And don't worry –making the shift isn't that hard. All of us can make this change if we really want to. Even if you were taught to value independence and ambition above all else since childhood (like me), there is still hope for you yet. :)

One of the most effective ways to bring about this shift is to go through the process I mentioned above. Take some time to meditate and really understand that all of this is temporary. Imagine your funeral or something similar if it helps. Then simply observe how you feel. The parts of you that aren't in line with the present moment will be extremely apparent. They will hurt, moan and cringe. Ouch! The parts of you that ARE in line with right now will actually feel elated. Go ahead, give it a shot, what do you have to lose?

Doing so will give you the perspective you need to start changing your inner views immediately. The external will accordingly fall into place.

And rest assured, if peace of mind is your goal, then you need to make this shift. It may be difficult, especially if you're a Westerner (like me again) and have been treating existence as a race for your entire life, but it can be done.

All it takes is unlearning some bad habits, and learning some good ones. Much like success in anything else, all you need after that is some persistence and willingness to change.

Categories: Tips for Life